new pope

So, apparently, all new popes get to choose their papal name. The new pope, or Ratzi as I used to call him in our frat days, chose Pope Benedict, I believe. This is in spite of several suggestions I made:

-Pope Boba Fett
-Pope Alufagus
-Pope Onarope
-Pope Awsome
-Tu Pope Shakur

Just wait’ll it’s my turn. I’ll be the coolest Pope ever. It’ll be like that movie where John Goodman becomes the kind of England or whatever. I’ll go bowling and I’ll date a stripper. And I’ll have this one uptight cardinal that always follows me around and whenever I do something whacky he’ll yell out, “Ai Pappa!” I can’t wait.